Stay
by dancer4eva
Summary: A drabble based on Sugarland's "Stay".


It had been a long case this time. Cases involving little kids were always the worst; JJ was right. Without Derek on the team any longer, it seems the hard cases were getting harder. Slowly, everything was falling apart. Derek had promised him, though, that should Spencer ever need him, Derek would always be there. After some time, being there began to take on a whole new meaning.

A few months ago, after a similarly hard case, Derek came by. Beers and a movie turned into making out, which eventually turned in making love. No, into sex. Spencer won't call it making love; Derek is still with Savanah.

Tonight, nothing had changed. Spencer came home and Derek was waiting for him—he must have known it was bad from the lack of texts between the two. Spencer couldn't fall asleep. Derek laid beside him, snoring. And Spencer just waited.

_I've been sittin' here, starin' at the clock on the wall  
And I've been layin' here, prayin'  
Prayin' she won't call  
It's just another call from home, and you'll get it  
And be gone, and I'll be cryin'_

_And I'll be beggin' you, baby  
Beg you not to leave  
But I'll be left here waitin'  
My heart on my sleeve  
Oh, for the next time we'll be here  
Seems like a million years, and I think I'm dyin'_

_What do I have to do to make you see  
She can't love you like me?_

There is was. Derek's phone lit up. Savanah's first message. Probably along the lines of "Good night. I love you. Don't stay at Spencer's too late." Spencer knew, because it always said the same thing. But Derek was asleep. Give a minute. Ah. The call. Spencer already had Derek's clothes laid out and his things repacked. Spencer may be Derek's Pretty Boy, but he isn't enough to make him stay.

_Why don't you stay?  
I'm down on my knees  
I'm so tired of bein' lonely  
Don't I give you what you need?  
When she calls you to go  
There is one thing you should know  
We don't have to live this way  
Baby, why don't you stay?_

A few months later, Derek came over, out of the blue. There hadn't been a case. Spencer wasn't craving, so he knew neither JJ nor Garcia called him. Derek brought beer and a movie. But before the film even began, broke down. Spencer's heart stops when Derek says "I'm leaving her." When? Is all Spencer can think. Derek seems to read his mind when he adds, "Soon." So never, is Spencer's internal reply.

_You keep tellin' me, baby  
There will come a time  
When you will leave her arms  
And forever be in mine  
But I don't think that's the truth  
And I don't like bein' used, and I'm tired of waitin'_

_It's too much pain to have to bear  
To love a man you have to share_

Spencer dutifully waits. Derek has promised. Next time Derek comes around, Spencer asks. When? Spencer screams "I love you!" at Derek. But Derek keeps promising, soon. That night, Spencer lies awake, waiting for the call. This though, he's ready to beg Derek not to leave. His tears, his words, nothing sways Derek.

_Why don't you stay?  
I'm down on my knees  
I'm so tired of bein' lonely  
Don't I give you what you need?  
When she calls you to go  
There is one thing you should know  
We don't have to live this way  
Baby, why don't you stay?_

It's another hard case. This time, he knows Garcia will call Derek. No one suspects a thing—just that nothing makes him feel better than Derek. But this time, Spencer's prepared. He's changed the locks on the door. He's bought sound cancelling headphones. And the biggest tissue pack he could find. Derek won't be getting through tonight.

_I can't take it any longer, but my will is gettin' stronger  
And I think I know just what I have to do  
I can't waste another minute  
After all that I've put in it  
I've given you my best  
Why does she get the best of you?_

_So next time you find you wanna leave her bed for mine_

It feels like he's dying. Spencer has locked him out. He can't blame him. Derek knows he's the bad guy this time. But leaving Savanah would create too many problems. But not having Spencer may be his punishment for not loving him the way he should have.

It feels like he's dying. He's locked out Derek. It takes every ounce of self-control, self-control Derek helped him find after his addiction, to not open that door. He loves Derek; oh, how he loves him. But Derek prefers to hide behind Savanah than to love him. And Spencer is finally strong enough to want to be loved right.

_Why don't you stay?  
I'm up off my knees  
I'm so tired of bein' lonely  
You can't give me what I need  
When she begs you not to go  
There is one thing you should know  
I don't have to live this way_

_Baby, why don't you stay?_


End file.
